The world needs to let go…of a Creator God.

“Religious faith represents so uncompromising a misuse of the power of our minds that it forms a kind of perverse, cultural singularity – a vanishing point beyond which rational discourse proves impossible. When foisted upon each generation anew, it renders us incapable of realizing just how much of our world has ceded to a dark and barbarous past.”

– Sam Harris, The End of Faith: Religion, Terror, and the Future of Reason.

To all my religious followers (if there are any), I’d totally understand it if you need to stop following me.  No hard feelings.

I found this book on the for sale shelf at my local library.  And am thrilled…and alarmed…and relieved…and alarmed.

What I’m reading further reinforces my feelings that I will not and can not, in good conscience, believe in a Creator God.  Even though it separates me from my entire family and most of the individuals who happen to cross my path.

Killing people for heresy still goes on and will continue until we drop the illusion and find more creative ways of personal transformation.

About Casey

“the only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars and in the middle you see the blue centerlight pop and everybody goes ‘Awww!’ ~ Jack Kerouac, On The Road Again
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8 Responses to The world needs to let go…of a Creator God.

  1. I commend you on your quest. You are definitely asking the right question, one I have wrestled with for over 25 years. If I may, I would like to separate the question even further with a few clarifications.

    1. You are correct to specifically identify Creator; specifically, whether there is an entity or a mind that is the origin of the Universe that we live in.

    2. The concept of Creator is not necessarily the same as a theistic entity, much less the monotheistic God of Judaism, Christianity or Islam. These questions are important, but you only get to them if you answer the question of “Is there a Creator” in the affirmative. For example, Albert Einstein believed in a Creator, but he did not believe in any type of a personal God.

    3. Humans are not going to be able to answer this question with 100% certainty, either in favor of or against a Creator. All we can do is examine the evidence and make a decision on which answer provides a better explanation for the Universe we live in and the life we live. Reasonable people can reach different conclusions, but ultimately we all need to reach a conclusion, either consciously or by default.

    With that background, I happen to believe the evidence is overwhelming that there is a Creator. If I recall correctly you are a scientist so I will focus on scientific evidence in favor of a Creator. I have read a lot in this area. The best arguments against a Creator are put forth by Stephen Hawking and Leonard Mlodinow who argue that the Universe can create itself out of nothing. They are coherent and logical in their arguments (This is in contrast to the militant “new atheists” such as Dawkins, Harris, Hitchens and Krauss who are good at selling books but bad at logic and civility).

    The best arguments in favor of a Creator are by John Polkinghorne, Francis Collins, Robert Spitzer and Martin Rees. These writers are experts in physics, cosmology and genetics and I happen to find their evidence exceptionally convincing. Set forth below is a link to a small summary of the evidence for a Creator from cosmology.

    I will not go into a lot of detail here on weighing the evidence but I would appreciate having an open dialogue, even if we disagree, because I enjoy learning from knowledgeable people who honestly look at these questions in good faith, which you do. Please feel free to share what resources, books, arguments, etc. you find most helpful.

    W. Ockham

    • Casey says:

      I fear I might not be very good at debating this issue.

      I appreciate the input.

      I’m not sure I could provide you with evidence, in book form. I know from personal experience of the judgment I have gotten at the hands of my Christian family members and people I have tried to dialogue with regarding some deeply personal issues.

      I’m not afraid of sharing my experience (well, a little, I suppose:)

      I’ve been emotionally, psychologically and sometimes physically abused by the mother who went to church EVERY Sunday morning.

      I’ve had two abortions. The first one was after my husband got me pregnant before we were married. He asked me to abort because he could not marry me at the time. Nice Christian boy there, huh?

      I cheated on my husband twice before I knew I was polyamorous (and then attempted to open up the marriage, and failed). I’m choosing monogamy, though if I could make polyamory work somehow, I would.

      I’ve had a husband with a 15 year long binge-drinking problem who would not turn to the church for help, despite having a conviction that he believes in Jesus Christ. He also ran to the gun cabinet to blow his brains out a couple of times, but he really didn’t mean it. But at the time, it sure felt like he did.

      You can see what i mean here (it’s a true story, only our names have been changed).

      My family is Catholic, my husband’s is Protestant. There have been times when it got UGLY over how we would raise the kids. I’m raising them without God, though they have been baptized Catholic – after a LONG fight about it with my sister in law who told me I shouldn’t.

      I’ve been unofficially threatened with disownment by my family about 5 times now.

      I don’t have the evidence you look for. I only have my personal experience with breaking ALL of God’s commandments and alienation by Christians in my real life.

      I did like this:

      I would recommend reading Deuteronomy 13:7-11. Because I’m a non-believer, I’d be put to death for that alone. Stoned for adultery, and at risk for being blown up for visiting an abortion clinic (at the one I went to, I was fortunately only harassed). My sister is vehemently anti-abortion. She hates what I did. Oh, well, my body, my choice NOT to give birth at 41.

      I was harassed by the wife of a Christian minister when I told her I used mindfulness meditation with some success. She proceeded to tell me how that opens the door for Satan to come in (um…RIIIIGHT).

      I’m not really wanting to offend anyone. I have ZERO friends, and mostly it’s because I can’t stand up to the insensitive treatment by Christians.

      As you can imagine, my life has been deeply painful. Not because I made mistakes, but because of how people have treated me for my mistakes.

      It boggled my mind to hear about the Buddhists that recently murdered people. That really bothered me because Eastern spirituality really resonates.

      My feelings about this are more instinctual…not intellectual. I have no ability nor desire to argue against anyone’s faith. I don’t WANT to undermine anyone’s faith. But I don’t like what people have done in the name of faith. At all.

      I got really upset recently that Adam and Eve got one chance to screw up and they were cast out from God’s Eden and not only were they punished, but their children and their children’s children. Why did God put the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil in the Garden at all? When I was a mother of small, immature children, I put all the things I didn’t want them to touch somewhere they couldn’t even see it. Seems to be that God was setting them up to fail. It just fails to register any kind of sense in me.

      I just know that these religions are not doing what it’s SUPPOSED to be doing. Too many people have been killed for not believing in a Protestant God, or a Catholic God or Muslim God. If something in the bible doesn’t fit modern times, then we can cherry pick that which does fit and claim the rest is simply metaphorical.

      All I keep doing is feeling relief that I don’t believe in heaven and hell, God and Satan.

      Relieved, but very, very alone.

      • Casey, thank you for being so open. I completely missed the boat with my response and I apologize if I have done any harm. I also apologize on behalf of any of the self-proclaimed Christians in your own life who have behaved with very un-Christian like attitudes towards you. I also share your condemnation about all of the violence that has been done in the name of religion.

        In many ways my own story is different than yours but there are more than a few similarities. I was blessed with good parents and a good support system growing up, but I was also very ego-centric. With only a slight stretch of the ten commandments, I have been a perfect 10-10 in violating them, often frequently. My marriage has some of the same characteristics that you described in yours, including a deep sense of loneliness at times.

        I am not out to convert you or anyone else; I am only sharing some of the experiences in my journey, which on the outside has been placid but on the inside has sometimes been stormy and turbulent. There was a point not that many years ago when I was close to hitting bottom and I was grasping at meaning and purpose in life. At that point I was completely disengaged from any type of religion, considering it foolish tales of people who can not handle the truth. However, in my desperation, I reached for a life raft, the only one I felt comfortable with, which was reason. As such, I read a lot searching for meaning and purpose. I am an INTJ personality so I am skeptical by nature. Ultimately, my reason led me to open my heart just a crack and I had experiences that I am unable to describe that completely changed me. I also rediscovered the faith of my youth, but understand it in completely different ways (e.g. there may or may not have been a historical Adam and Eve, but the metaphorical story of turning away from God is real; the horrific passages in the Old Testament deal with the internal struggle going on in each of us; God primarily acts through the outcasts of society, often through deeply flawed people who have committed major atrocities). There is an old Spanish proverb that goes “God writes straight with broken lines”.

        I do not know you, but you strike me as a sincere, passionate, intelligent, caring and loving woman who is destined to do great things, both for yourself and those in your life. Have faith in yourself first and foremost and be open to experiencing the Truth wherever you find it, especially in the people around you (and in your children most of all).

        W. Ockham

      • Casey says:


        I am touched by your words and sincerity. I have not received this kind of thoughtful reply, from anyone in a while. It’s something I wish I would could have, indeed, longed to have from everyone that I meet and wish to learn from.

        You have done no harm. I think you may have helped, even.

        It has occurred to me that Jesus’ teachings are sound. But experience has taught me that the application of the bible has distorted his teachings. Ghandi has said, “I like your Christ. I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ”.

        What is the reason for this disconnect?

        I have appreciated Christ’s teachings. But because I can’t reconcile the behavior of Christians with the model of Christ, I begin to doubt that organized religion actually works.

        In my youth, I used to talk to God all the time. I never formally prayed very well. I never formally praised very well either. I just called out to God because I was frequently in need of help. And I received what I felt was spiritual messages and experiences…particularly once when I was 13 and wanting to commit suicide (between 7th and 8th grade I attended three schools because we moved and was bullied in each school. I began to realize the common denominator was me). I planned my suicide in my head, and went to bed in tears and fell asleep begging God for help.

        The next morning, I woke up extremely at peace. I felt a weight lifted off my shoulders. I felt so much stronger, like I could face the unrelenting attacks one more day. I didn’t have to die. I could face whatever it was that came that day.

        The house I was staying in at the time was temporary, and my cousin rented it before us. Her brother in law, some time before we got there, supposedly shot himself in the attic where my two older sisters and I slept. At least that’s what I thought all these years. I never did get confirmation on where he killed himself, but the attic was his room and I always thought he had. It actually comforted me, not weirded me out.

        Who heard my cries that night? Was it God? What is something in the Universe? Was it a collective unconscious? Was it my own higher self?

        I’ve had many instances of synchronicity that have happened too regularly to be accidental.

        But when I walked among Christians, looking for community and fellowship, I received little to none. I found judgment and confusion and very little critical thought (around here, anyway).

        My own internal conflict on this matter and the social rejection has made me afraid. There is Truth, and there is falseness masquerading as Truth. Discernment is difficult.

        I would have loved to have met Jesus and have a nice, long heart to heart chat with him and ask him if my experience in life is what God wanted for me…and what I’m supposed to do about it now. I know, very well, that God worked through very flawed people. I scoured the bible for the passages that were related to everything I have done wrong. I saw only forgiveness and redemption.

        And I’m wondering, as I’m writing, so then if I know that, then why have I turned away?

        Because my personal experience of spirituality has been vastly different than what is preached on Sunday, and what is taken into the world Monday through Saturday. And in trying to find community with others, I find that their religion often gets in the way of true spiritual communion with another human being.

        That’s not to say what is happening in this space, between you and I, is not communion. I think it is.

        You seem to understand and you are compassionate, something I need from others. You seem to have gone through the dark night of the soul and have found resolution and strength.

        I’m still wandering about, lost, doubtful that I can ever escape my shame, even though, cognitively, I’ve dealt with what I’ve done and set my intentions on making different choices for myself. On a spiritual level, I have not found healing yet.

        I have to ponder what you’ve shared.

        Being a skeptic hurts. I don’t relish being this way. Not because of the alienation from others so much as the internal division it creates, and as you know, it makes life a lot harder than it should be.

        George Carlin once said, “Scratch a cynic and you’ll find a disappointed idealist.” You could apply that to an atheist (at least to some). Scratch an atheist and you might find a disappointed believer. Or something like that.

        By the way, I am sometimes INFP and sometimes INTJ. I can actually feel two different ways of being inside, which is one of the reasons I often feel at odds with myself.

        Again, thank you so much for your thoughtful response here.

  2. Erik Andrulis says:

    So, since I’m the World, and I’m the Creator God, and I’m Casey, creating Myself, I’m telling Myself to let go of Myself. Ok, done. :0)

    • Casey says:

      I have this beautiful book, recommended to me by a dear friend…

      Living Beautifully with Uncertainty and Change by Pema Chodron.

      Ever hear of it, or her? She takes the teachings in The Way of the Boddhisattva by Shantideva and upcycles it in language we Westerners (with our fixed beliefs and supposedly rational – not! – minds) can comprehend. I just picked it up yesterday. Gorgeous book.

      Slowly, ever so slowly, I’m inching my way towards acceptance of who I am, what I have done, what I may become.

      Much love to you Erik.


      • Erik Andrulis says:

        Love and respect Casey after all that’s been done and all that is done, it is a wonder I sustain myself still. I had not heard of that book will check it out …afk right now on iPhone so hard to give lengthy reply to earlier post. Will do so soon. Peace, sister

      • Casey says:

        I really am grateful to you, Erik. I hope you know how glad I am to know myself through you. No worries on the when, I’ll be here.

        Peace, my friend.

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