The minor scandal I caused just a few days ago on someone’s blog is no longer such a devastating weight on my spirit. It was hard, extremely hard to relinquish the mortification I felt at just harsh treatment. I’m not a bad person (even if I’m told I do bad things).
Yesterday, it was a nice afternoon and evening…my oldest had performed in a school opera – La Cerentola. It was adorable, and so much fun. But I couldn’t sleep last night. I had some trouble turning off my mind. I was beset by mild worries because of what I said on someone’s blog kept coming back to haunt me. Not terribly so, just enough to give me a headache. The kind that doesn’t respond well to acetomenophen.
I finally gave up trying to sleep and turned on the computer to check my email. A new friend of mine told me some beautifully encouraging words…and relieved me of some of my burden.
I wrote a brief response to him, because I had been so emotionally drained and tired that I couldn’t articulate much that early in the morning. I finished my short letter to him and then I went for a walk outside. By then, it was about 3:30 in the morning. Outside the air was cool and wet with a fine mist of rain. I looked up to gaze at the stars, but couldn’t see them, as the sky was blanketed in thick gray clouds. It was still a beautiful night and I was just grateful to think that I do have some pretty amazing online friends…even if they are too far away for me to see face to face.
I was listening to my favorite band, Mumford and Sons quietly on my husband’s iPod, but I could still hear birds chirping and the mist was cool on my skin. It was all very delightful.
This is one of my favorite songs I was listening to on my walk.
Such intense lyrics.
When I woke up and the girls were off to school, I wrote a longer letter to my friend. I was sharing with him my love of Brazilian author Paulo Coelho’s writings and it reminded me of how blessed I was to have discovered his work. It has been really important to my spiritual journey…and what happened to me this week just made me think about him again.
I decided to re-blog an old post of mine – a little tribute to Paulo Coelho. It was my way of publicly thanking one of my heroes. I could have never predicted that Mr. Coelho himself would take notice of it and Twitter it.
Just before bedtime, I took a look at my blog (you know, because I do get interested in the comments people might leave on my blog) and was shocked because my stats…which normally hover anywhere between the 20 and 30 mark soared from 1600 to over 3,000 in about 5 minutes. Goodness gracious, what a dizzy feeling.
This is a beautiful thing to me, because I was able to thank one of my heroes and he responded so kindly. I know he’s an incredibly busy author and blogger and one amazing human being. For me, this is much more meaningful than being Freshly Pressed or given a blog award.
I truly believe that all the synchronicity I’ve experienced of late (but haven’t really had the chance to talk about) is all moving me towards the right path, and steering me away from blind alleys and bad apples. The pain I felt less than 24 hours ago has been replaced by a feeling of such incredible warmth, love and joy. I feel that God has heard me and responded in such a tangible way. It’s as if a messenger from God stopped by my house and said, “Hey Casey, it’s really going to be all right. Sometimes you lose some, but sometimes you actually DO win”.
And as of this sentence, 5,016 people have taken a peek at my blog (in just a few hours) and a few kind people have stopped by to say hello and spread some love and light. Thank you so much, Mr. Coelho. You just restored a little bit of faith that there is some hope for humanity after all.